Really don't know what I'm doing....

Thanks for making me a blog, Riann. (And holding my hand while I try to actually write a message here.) So I think I'm going to put family news and stuff here. I'm not funny, but my life is something of a running joke. So I hope this won't be unbearably dull.

Independance Day is one of our favorite holidays at our house. The kids said it would trump Christmas if there was a present involved. This year was a little rough. Our tradition is to spend the day with Wendy and Richard in Crestline and then watch fireworks across the valley. But Wendy's little sister was very sick on Saturday, so we didn't go up for the parade. Then I went to be with her (at their parents' home) when her sister passed away early Sunday afternoon. I kept thinking about my sisters and how much I love them. I kept thinking of how I could barely function when we thought we were losing Riann. The feeling was very much the same at the Sellers' house. Lots of tissue and some laughing through tears. Talking and hugging and trying to figure out how to function aside from remembering to breathe.

Tammy died at her parents' home. She was in the last stages of breast cancer. She was a single mother of a little girl who turns 10 this Friday. Wendy and Richard have had little Kayla with them all winter while Tammy was at City of Hope trying to get well. She was sent home to die two weeks ago. The whole family was there to be with Tammy and support Kayla as she lost her mother and her best friend. Kayla's cousins were her anchor. She didn't want to talk to any adults. She didn't want anyone to hug her or talk to her. She said goodbye to her mom and wanted to go outside with her cousins. They all stayed around her like a little clump. They talked about kid stuff. They kept her in the back yard while the morgue came for the body and while the pain medications were collected from all around, and all the medical things done away with. Kayla had loaned her blankie to her mom, so that was folded up at the foot of the empty bed.

I was thinking how thankful everyone was to have the gospel. To know that everything was well in hand, though not in our hands. I was thinking how great it was to have Sheila around when we were scared about losing Riann. I tried to do like she did, and I was glad I was able to be there to help in lots of little ways.

The fireworks started all over the neiborhood as soon as it got dark. That was really neat because Tammy was that kind of girl. She really was one of the most animated people I've ever met. It was perfect to have all the fireworks on the day she finished her stay on Earth.

When I got home, the kids were on the back deck with Stan. They were all trying to figure out a way to get on the roof for a better view. (I go away for a few hours!!) I put a quick kabosh on that and we got in the car and found an empty field where we got a good view of some of the firework finales all around.

So the fourth of July was fun, after all. We sat in the back of the red pick-up and snuggled to keep warm (unseasonably cool around here) and oooed and aaahhed and yelled and pointed at the good ones. It was Rachel's first time and she was caught up in the excitement and was squealing and bouncing in Stan's arms. We got home and snuggled everyone in their beds while the last few bangs and pops came through the open windows. I'm so thankful to have each member of my little family safe and sound.

And I'm so thankful to have my sisters and brothers and neices and nephews and parents all safe and sound. It was fun to see so many at Grandma's birthday. I'm so glad that my kids get to be with their cousins. I'm really looking forward to spending more time with everyone next summer. We really missed the missing cousins and Aunt and Uncles.

I hope everyone can find time to say hi on the new family sight. I want to know how Riann's trip is going and how DeNae's trip is going and how everyone is doing.